IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP ABUSIVE? Have you stopped spending time with friends or family because of your partner's jealousy? Are you forced to explain and justify every place you go, everything you do, and every person you see to avoid making your partner angry? Does your partner ridicule, criticize, belittle or insult you? Are you afraid to disagree with your partner? Has your partner ever hit, slapped, shoved, kicked or thrown things at you? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be involved in an abusive relationship. Often people do not realize they are being abused, especially if there is no physical violence. You may feel that the abuse is your fault and that you are responsible for the problems in the relationship. You cannot make someone hurt you – they make a choice to do it. Remember: THE ABUSE IS NOT YOUR FAULT. A domestic violence counselor can offer support, answer questions, help you develop a safety plan, offer shelter, and provide advocacy. Go to top  WHAT IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE? Domestic Violence is a pattern of abusive and controlling behaviors that some individuals use against their intimate partners or former partners. It may include any or all of the following: Physical Abuse: Hitting, slapping, punching, kicking, choking, using weapons or other objects to cause injury. Sexual Abuse: Forcing a partner to engage in unwanted sexual activity; treating a partner like a sex object. Emotional Abuse: Name-calling or put-downs, jealousy, denying or shifting blame, threatening to harm self or others, lying, abusing children or pets, stalking. Property/Economic Abuse: Withholding money or basic needs such as food, shelter, or medical treatment; stealing or destroying belongings or money; interfering or sabotaging a partner's job or education. Isolation: Being secluded from friends and family; limiting outside involvement; not allowing use of car, phone, or other methods of communication. Go to top  FACTS ABOUT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Domestic Violence is the single largest health risk to American women – over breast cancer, heart disease, automobile accidents or any other violent crime. 4.9 million women are physically or sexually assaulted by an intimate partner every year (Tjaden and Thoennes, July 2000). In 1999, there were 23 family violence homicides in Connecticut (State of CT, Dept. of Public Safety, March 2000). Domestic Violence crosses all socioeconomic and cultural lines. Up to 50% of all homeless women & children in the U.S. are fleeing domestic violence (NCADV). While alcohol is present in more than 50% of all incidents of domestic violence, alcohol or other drug use is neither an excuse for nor a direct cause of domestic violence (Collins and Messerschmidt, 1993). Go to top  Susan B. Anthony Project CAN Help! The Susan B. Anthony Project Provides: One-on-one support counseling Day and evening appointments available Emergency shelter Transitional living program Help with restraining orders Weekly support groups Legal advocacy Medical advocacy Referrals to other services as necessary No One Deserves to be Abused Help is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year Always free and completely confidential 24-Hour Crisis Line 860-482-7133 (or toll-free 1-888-774-2900) Go to top